It’s the official end-of-blogging-sabbatical weekend thread!


by Katy
29th September, 2006 at 11:37 pm    

Thank you, thank you… it’s great to be back.

Of course, “back” is a relative term given that I have been commenting here most days anyway. But I have missed you all, or would have done if I hadn’t been on here commenting most days, but if I hadn’t been you can bet that I would have. Really.

I think I have made myself clear.

Today I made An Enemy at work, thanks to my unruly sense of humour. Most of the time I manage to keep my streams of consciousness out of the workplace but every now and again they just sneak out when I’m not looking. I was being shown how to use a new computer at work by a training lady:

Training lady: “And this computer is broadband connected so it is much faster than the ones upstairs.”

Me: “And we can use any of our databases from this too?”

Training lady: “It’s a real minefield of information.”

Me: “A minefield?”

Training lady: “Absolutely, a real minefield.”

Me: “Er… is that a good thing?”

Training lady: “Of course!”

Me: (chortling) “Perhaps you should put some signs up. Like, ‘Beware of Information!’”

Training lady: (eyeballing me suspiciously) “What?”

Me: (hastily) “But tell me about these pamphlets over here.”

But it was too late; the damage was done, especially when my colleague Ginger and I started squabbling over the contents of our promotional goody bags (he selfishly refused to swap his bookmark for my post-it notes) whilst she was trying to sell us some on-line courses. She is my enemy for life.

And now it is over to you. What have you been doing this week? What plans do you have for the weekend? And what bitter, implacable enemies have you accidentally made recently? Share it all with us on the open thread… and remember, kids: the open thread is a politics-free zone…


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  1. ZinZin — on 30th September, 2006 at 12:02 am  

    Katy
    I think you will find that i have the greater breadth of knowledge and experience in alienating absolutely anyone.
    At work i have irritated many with inappropriate humour, recently told my supervisor that i am looking for alternative employment, no longer interested in undertaking training and refused to attend the councils round table discussion on customer service.

    It all about storing up more trouble at a later date.
    Beat that.

  2. Nyrone — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:17 am  

    It’s been a really long week, I feel a little tired.
    I wish I had a personal ice-cream van to drive around in and play ‘Greensleeves’ on full-blast with, that would probably make me feel better…

    However, just heard Lupe Fiasco’s album….probably best rap album for me since late registration (with the possible exception of Plan B’s debut)

    I hate how music has become escapism for me on the train rather than the hope it used to fill me with as a child…I hate growing up.

  3. Sunny — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:23 am  

    Enemy fo’ life! You in trouble now young lady.

    On an unrelated note scientists have found that women are much more likely to use lots of exclamation marks in emails.

    Is Bananabrain around? I spent the evening talking to a gorgeous Jewish woman who had some Indian blood and said she knew all Indians Jews in London or was somehow related to them. Is the sub-community that small? Bananabrain are you from Calcutta sides?

  4. jamal — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:34 am  

    Dont worry about the work enemies… I have lots of them. As long as your performance is good, they cant affect you.

  5. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:02 am  

    I spent the evening talking to a gorgeous Jewish woman who had some Indian blood and said she knew all Indians Jews in London or was somehow related to them. Is the sub-community that small? Bananabrain are you from Calcutta sides?

    There are two types of Indian Jews. Marathi speaking Bene Israel Jews (who incidently hail from my hometown Alibaug) and Bagghdadi Jews. There are about 1200 Bene Israeli Jews in London and Surrey.

  6. Katy Newton — on 30th September, 2006 at 9:22 am  

    Much though I adore Ashkenazi cooking, the Bene Israelis have some amazing recipes.

    Sunny, it’s quite possible that she does know most of the other Indian Jews. Even in the wider, mostly Ashkenazi Jewish community in London, if I meet someone I don’t know we often end up finding that we have friends or acquaintances in common.

  7. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 10:40 am  

    the Bene Israelis have some amazing recipes.

    The Bene Israeli cuisine is same as that of local Konkani folk… it is commonly mistaken for Goan seafood.

    P.S I checked up with Marathi Mandal, Reading they have about 56 Bene Israel guys on their rolls.

  8. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 12:12 pm  

    Nyrone – If you get the ice-cream van, will you drive it over here so that I can have a 99? Please.

    Sunny – When we lived in Hendon, our neighbours were Indian Jews from Pune. They were extremely hospitable, effervescent, and religious in a totally sensible way (not like the hat and beard guys). Although they all spoke excellent colloquial English, at home they spoke Hindi or Ladino. I went to their home, to see the bride, when their daughter got married, and it was the most exciting mix of cultures that I have witnessed. They managed to make a perfect mix of Indian, middle eastern, British and Jewish traditions.

    They also said that they knew every Indian Jew in London. I believe them.

  9. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 12:49 pm  

    My girlfriend has thrown me out! Why? Because I passed out and didn’t stay up with her friends. I thought I was giving her some space, she thought I was ignoring them. Women. You can’t sleep with them when they’re angry with you. It’s not fair. I’ve had to come to work to get some head space :(

  10. Kulvinder — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:04 pm  

    They were extremely hospitable, effervescent, and religious in a totally sensible way (not like the hat and beard guys)

    hey ive met some pretty ace orthodox jews

  11. Chris Stiles — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:23 pm  

    Sunny, it’s quite possible that she does know most of the other Indian Jews. Even in the wider, mostly Ashkenazi Jewish community in London, if I meet someone I don’t know we often end up finding that we have friends or acquaintances in common.

    That’s not uncommon in other communities also, is it ? In fact, I believe the name ‘Jaffna’ – as in the city – originally referred to the abstract notion for a place with just this web of relationships.

  12. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:23 pm  

    I want to become Jewish. Katy marry me

  13. ZinZin — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:30 pm  

    Kismet you do know that you will be sacrificing your foreskin?

  14. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:51 pm  

    Kulvinder – Yes, so have I. It is their take on religion that bothers me. I went to a Jewish girls’ school. When I went there, it was a school for Jewish girls. Now it is a school for ultra orthodox Jewish girls. Girls who are unlikely to become anything more than housewives and mothers in arranged marriages. Who are not only going to dress modestly, something of which I don’t disapprove, but in a uniformly modest way, who are going to cover their hair, while their husbands wear the the clothes of 17th century Polish aristocrats.

    My Indian, Jewish friends completely obeyed the laws of both Torah and Talmud while looking, and acting, in a manner completely compatable with modern European life.

    ZinZin – If Kismet is a Muslim, he doesn’t have one.

  15. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:53 pm  

    compatible, compatible, compatible.

    I hate making spelling mistakes.

  16. Katy Newton — on 30th September, 2006 at 1:59 pm  

    Oh Kismet, I thought you’d never ask! When shall we have the ceremony? I think I can probably get next Thursday off work.

  17. Sunny — on 30th September, 2006 at 2:35 pm  

    Do I get invited as the bachola (Panjabi term for someone who arranges the marriage… or atleast introduces people!).

    I expect to get lots of presents too!

  18. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 2:37 pm  

    Indeed I am circumcised. I think I just got dumped by text by the way. Hm. Thursday you say Katy? My heart probably wouldn’t have mended by then but my cock should work, so yeah, it’s a date. I’ll bring cake

  19. bikhair aka taqiyyah — on 30th September, 2006 at 2:50 pm  

    Kismet Hardy,

    “I think I just got dumped by text by the way.”

    Thats shady. We dont text as much as you British peoples. She should have called you, and told you how much of a lame ass you were.

  20. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 2:59 pm  

    Thanks bikhair. you and my mum should get together and go bowling

  21. mirax — on 30th September, 2006 at 4:46 pm  

    Found this interesting:
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/06/africa_india0s_african_communities/html/1.stm

    Didn’t know that there were long settled african communities in India. India’s mindboggling in that sense; seems to have absorbed and accomodated a startling range of peoples.

  22. Clairwil — on 30th September, 2006 at 4:50 pm  

    Welcome back Katy and congratulations on snapping up young Kismet.

  23. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 4:58 pm  

    I don’t know as much about India as I’d like, but it seems to be, from what I’ve gathered here, a very tolerant society.

    When I was a girl, back in the 60s, our next door neighbours were an Indian family, the man of the house was something important to do with the Indian High Commission and the Tea Centre (does it still exist BTW}, and his wife and my mother were extremely good friends. For the five years they lived in London, she and my mother saw each other nearly every day, were in and out of each other’s houses, and for all that time, though they confided in each other, they never called each other anything else but Mrs. When Mrs – - G—-
    and her family left this country, she and my mother both wept. I still have the ebony elephants she gave my mother as a parting gift on my dressing table. And I’ve never had such high quality tea since.

  24. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 4:59 pm  

    Clairwil – As Katy’s mum, I will be speaking to my bank manager on Monday :-)

  25. Clairwil — on 30th September, 2006 at 5:26 pm  

    Oh you must be very excited Chairwoman. Are you going to buy a new hat?

  26. justforfun — on 30th September, 2006 at 5:31 pm  

    Chairwoman

    I don’t know as much about India as I’d like, but it seems to be, from what I’ve gathered here, a very tolerant society.

    I fear you have a romantic idea and want to imagine that there is a place that is tolerant and that humans are more tolerant than here in the UK.

    Life is tough in India and most are just trying to get by, so they learn to get on with everyone around if at all possible. But tolerant? perhaps, perhaps not. Tolerant of ‘others’ perhaps if all is going well and on a personal level – but just don’t get caught up in riot unless you want to perhaps get a flavour of what a pogram in Eastern Europe might have been like. The mood can switch very fast and then it gets horrific very very fast.

    Tolerant of a family member who steps outside the norms and customs, probably not. Just look at the numerous threads on women and their struggles in India. Its no cake walk.

    The place is huge and cannot be defined so easily. As mirax has pointed out in her post , there are peoples from all over the world who have settled in India and have been allowed to survive as distinct groups. If that is what you mean by tolerance, then in general Indians are tolerant, I suppose. However I would not say India is a compassionate place, but that is just my view.

    Sorry – just re-read my post – it sounds so depressing, but that’s the paradox. India is not a depressing place and I one day to get my body disposed of in India, and will be sure to piss off one set of ancestors, no matter how its done. Now I have cheered up :-)

    Justforfun

  27. sonia — on 30th September, 2006 at 5:36 pm  

    welcome back Katy!

  28. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 5:57 pm  

    Listen, I know I across as a bit of a hippy sometimes but please don’t make the mistake of thinking I’m not into materialism. You are all invited to mine and Katy’s weddings but you have to bring gifts. I’ve started my gift lists at http://www.a dreamyacht.com and http://www.luxuryvillas.com and http://www.midgetporn4U.org

    Thank you. Oh you must also bring beer

  29. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 5:58 pm  

    Can someone arrange my stag do? I have no friends

  30. justforfun — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:08 pm  

    Beware Katy – he only wants your passport !! and then he’ll dump you !! You’re his backup plan incase they suss him at his exam.

    Which one should I order?
    http://www.nautica.it/superyacht/home.htm

    Justforfun

  31. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:13 pm  

    Rumbled.

    But you’re not entirely right JFF

    I want to touch her breasts also

    I know. Incurable romantic

  32. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:14 pm  

    Just for Katy:

    Something Stupid Lyrics
    Artist(Band):Frank Sinatra
    Review The Song (0)
    Print the Lyrics

    Something Stupid Lyrics
    MP3 Downloads
    Send Frank Sinatra polyphonic ringtone to your cell phone
    Writer(s): Parks

    I know I stand in line, until you think you have the time
    To spend an evening with me
    And if we go someplace to dance, I know that there’s a chance
    You won’t be leaving with me

    And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place
    And have a drink or two
    And then I go and spoil it all, by saying something stupid
    Like: “I wanna fuck you up the arse”

  33. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:14 pm  

    Oh no. Now everyone knows my googling shame :(

  34. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:15 pm  

    Bollocks. And I got dumped today as well. How do unhappy people cope without drugs?

  35. justforfun — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:19 pm  

    Religion – religion, thats how!

    Todger intact – you could be come a sexcrazed Hindu I keep reading about.

    The Hare Krishna lot are always happy

    Justforfun

  36. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:22 pm  

    If religion is a drug, we’re all suffering the comedown…

  37. justforfun — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:28 pm  

    Plan B – Honey Greek yogurt with strawberries and then blended with a shot of whiskey, but if the Greek Yogurt is not available – vanilla choclate and hot chocolate suace and whiskey.

    In the morning – Wheetabix, brown sugar, Clotted cream and then- yes you got it – Whiskey and a little bit of milk if its too dry.

    Justforfun

  38. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:30 pm  

    Buddhism is like mushrooms. You get out of your body to lose yourself and find who’s operating your mind

    Hinduism is like marijuana. It makes you at one with your universe but too much of it and you start seeing goddesses with loadsa arms out to destroy you

    Sikhism is like ecstasy. It makes you happy and foolish and, in the morning, you realise you actually hate everyone

    Christianity is like cocaine. It makes you believe you’re better than everyone else but secretly you kinda know you’re coming across a bit like a wanker

    Atheism is like smack. Hey man, you do your thing. Just don’t bug me

    Islam is like crack. I’m doing what I do because I have to. I’m warning you right now dude, DO NOT FUCK WITH ME

  39. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:41 pm  

    Oh I forgot Judaism. Um..

  40. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:43 pm  

    Judaism is like speed. You have to run very fast…

    No that’s crap.

    Judaism is like amyl nitrate. It blows your mind and makes your butthole bigger

    No, sorry that’s just nonsense.

    Judaism is like crystal meth. It makes you think everyone else think you’re hard

    Hm.

    I’m stumped

  41. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:45 pm  

    My god. i have a problem with judaism after all. Damn my anti-semetic dad and his bastard conditioning :(

  42. Chairwoman — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:51 pm  

    Kismet – Actually it’s probably like cannabis, it makes people think you’re softer than you are.

  43. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:53 pm  

    Yay. I’ll go along with that. Makes you horny too

  44. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 6:56 pm  

    And everyone rolls theirs a different way :-)

  45. bikhair aka taqiyyah — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:00 pm  

    Kismet,

    “Islam is like crack. I’m doing what I do because I have to. I’m warning you right now dude, DO NOT FUCK WITH ME.”

    Crack is a very distructive drug. It was the pulse of the gang wars in Los Angeles where I am from and claimed the lives and future generations of many blacks. I am insulted. Islam is like viagra. At some point everyone will eventually need it.

    Kismet, do you need it? I know you do. Which is why your chick dumbed you.

  46. Clairwil — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:06 pm  

    I hope you don’t mind but I’ve gone off-list and purchased the Vardo as a wedding gift.

    http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/houses.htm

    After the honeymoon period is over, Katy will need somewhere to send Kismet when he’s naughty.

  47. Clairwil — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:09 pm  

    I’ve no time to organise a stag do for you Kismet but I could handcuff you to a fence and paint your bollocks green if you like.

  48. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:12 pm  

    “Islam is like viagra. At some point everyone will eventually need it.”

    Genius bikhair :-)

  49. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:13 pm  

    Clairwil. Paint my bollocks any colour you like darling. Use my cock as the brush though. It’s not big but it’s bendy from years of fucking myself…

  50. Clairwil — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:17 pm  

    I think I’d be better to use a brush, Katy might get angry.

  51. ZinZin — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:48 pm  

    Kismet
    You appear to be more Catholic than Muslim your pursuit of Katy is motivated by guilt not lust or love.

    Sorry about your foreskin.

  52. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 7:59 pm  

    @mirax:

    The Africans you refer to are probably Siddhis. This very district of Maharashtra i’m in is home to three unique communities in India. The Bene Israelis who found my hometown (Alibaug). Then there are these blue/green eyed unaturally fairskinned folk the Konkan Brahmins who are probably descendents of West Asian Jews/Zoroastrians/Copts who were later absorbed as Brahmin’s into Hindu fold. Konkan Brahmins form the bakcbone of Hindutva movement, my great grand mother herself a Konkan Brahmin was one of the first members of RSS Women’s wing!

    Then are these Siddhis, descendents of Ethiopian slaves brought bu the Muslims from Abyssinia who invaded these parts in 1500′s and ruled from their fortress in Murud which is just 35 miles south of Alibaug. These Siddhis are Muslims and speak Marathi. They are well… treated worse than dirt.

  53. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:03 pm  

    BBC photo of Siddhis people:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/06/africa_india0s_african_communities/html/2.stm

    the cleaning lady at my Marathi Gran’s house is a Siddhi i think.

  54. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:05 pm  

    And here is their Wikipedia article:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murud-Janjira

  55. Katy Newton — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:13 pm  

    I am so proud to be a part of the first ever PP wedding!

    Clairwil, Kismet is far too much of a good thing to keep to myself. If you want to use his little Kismet as a paintbrush you have my unwavering support.

  56. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:14 pm  

    zin zin, the best thing about being bred as a muslim is that my knob looks handsome as fuck

  57. Kismet Hardy — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:15 pm  

    Katy, I knew you’d support my inherent muslim urges of having orgies. I love you. And you. And you

    ooooo-yaaaa!

  58. Katy Newton — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:18 pm  

    Refusing to share you, Kismet, would be like refusing to let other people breathe the air or swim in the sea

  59. ZinZin — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:24 pm  

    Kismet,
    Only Catholic priests can match your sexual depravity.

    Has Abu Hamza ever made the mistake of wwiping his arse with the wrong hand. Just a thought.

  60. Vikrant Singh — on 30th September, 2006 at 8:24 pm  

    gee… kismet do i get to be the best man?

  61. ted_groony — on 30th September, 2006 at 11:53 pm  

    you people talk crazy talk

    meanwhile back at the ranch…

    >>>What have you been doing this week?

    work, home, eat, surf the intermawebs, sleep (and repeat)

    >>>What plans do you have for the weekend?

    11.50pm saturday and the weekend is half-cooked. the plumber came round this morning and fixed the tap in the bathroom; i have defrosted the fridge. tomorrow i shall do the laundry.

    IT? – it’s all glamour, glamour, glamour

    >>>And what bitter, implacable enemies have you accidentally made recently?

    they’re not called lusers for nothing you know. and it was no accident.

    well you *did* ask…

  62. Sunny — on 1st October, 2006 at 2:47 pm  

    Why do the weekend threads get taken over by Kismet Hardy’s carnal needs? I object. I think we need Rohin back here so KH can be put back in his place.

  63. Rohin — on 1st October, 2006 at 3:31 pm  

    You rang?

  64. Sunny — on 1st October, 2006 at 3:47 pm  

    You bar-steward, where have you been hiding?

  65. raz — on 1st October, 2006 at 3:58 pm  

    RAZ IS HERE MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Been missing me Rohin?

  66. Amir — on 1st October, 2006 at 4:49 pm  

    Rohin,

    Just watched your ‘adaptation’ (inverted commas mandatory) of The Matrix and think it’s fucking amazing!! You clever bastard.

    Raz – where’s the poontang. Give us some links. 8)

  67. Katy Newton — on 1st October, 2006 at 4:54 pm  

    This is not the weekend poontang thread!

    Oh, all right, if you must.

    *averts eyes*

  68. Jai — on 1st October, 2006 at 5:43 pm  

    I think Sunny deserves a big hand for running a superb blog and not allowing it to be hijacked into the usual b*tchfest which happens on so many other Asian group discussion forums. And for keeping this a down-to-earth, neurosis-free zone (more or less)

    Well done to all the PP commenters too — great discussions, relatively little sidetracking (unless it’s funny and non-malicious), and usually highly constructive. Very proud of everyone.

    I also love how PP embraces non-Asian commenters and bloggers too; it does make a difference, by giving a broader perspective on topics and generally by making PP a more inclusive place to be.

    Great stuff :)

    Let’s all try to make sure it stays this way.

  69. Sunny — on 1st October, 2006 at 5:57 pm  

    Jai, who says I’m Asian? ;)

    To paraphrase Guru Nanak with Michael Jackson… ‘Na koi black, na koi white…’

  70. justforfun — on 1st October, 2006 at 6:46 pm  

    I second that Jai .

    Now I’ve given some of my secret fusion recipes with whiskey – although I never have yet revealed my Gajar Ka Halwa recipe and how to fuse in the whiskey to make a great dish – and you can light it as well.

    How about a recipe column that we can try out at home during the week. My diet ended last week and I have to put the weight back on – I just don’t feel correct with a low BMI

    Justforfun

  71. Jagdeep — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:13 pm  

    I am about a quarter of the way through ‘Tourism’ by Nirpal Dhaliwal. It’s meant to be shocking I think.

  72. Jagdeep — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:15 pm  

    Indian Jews??

    SEXY!!!!

    I think someone should write a novel based around the Indian Jewish community in London, and it can be called Kosher Samosa

    That’s because Asian novels often seem to have to have some reference to curry in the title, or else white people get scared or something.

  73. Chairwoman — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:21 pm  

    Jagdeep – Had them, and they were delicious!

  74. Jagdeep — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:23 pm  

    Chairwoman, it’s rare that a samosa is anything other than delicious. Probably my favourite food, tea and samosas. So do Indian Jews have their own synagogues in London, or do they just muck in with the majority?

  75. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:34 pm  

    ,i>Just watched your ‘adaptation’ (inverted commas mandatory) of The Matrix and think it’s fucking amazing!! You clever bastard.

    I have that video on all the computers i own… (4 to be precise and in three countries). Funny video with our Rohin doing a gay version of Agent Smith.

  76. sonia — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:39 pm  

    hmmm all this talk of samosas is making me very hungry!

  77. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:40 pm  

    So do Indian Jews have their own synagogues in London, or do they just muck in with the majority?

    Well Indian Jews are of four types to the best of my knowledge. Malayali speaking Cochin Jews who are rare in UK, orginally Arabic speaking Bagdhadi Jews, Marathi speaking Bene Israelis and Pardesi Jews (descendents of Jewish deportees from Portugal to Goa). Of these i believe only Bene Israel are present in UK in any significant numbers. AFAIK they have no synagogue of their own in London. BTW I’m sitting just a few hundred meters from Jersualem Gate which is the oldest standing Jewish synagogue in South Asia.

  78. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:41 pm  

    Comment 77 ^^^ Wrong number ^^^

  79. sonia — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:44 pm  

    i was gonna ask vikrant which of your 3 computers are you sitting at now in which continent but you’ve given the game away..

  80. Katy Newton — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:48 pm  

    Ha, synagogues. There are quite a few around if you’re in an area with a strong Jewish community – not just the United, Reform, Masorti or Liberal ones, but lots of little ones for different Orthodox groups, some of which would be no more than a room in someone’s house in Golders Green or Stamford Hill. Or so I understand.

    I present you with this Jewish joke by way of illustration: two Jews get together, they build three synagogues. “You go to yours, I’ll go to mine and we’ll both boycott that son of a bitch on the hill.”

    I am not sure if Indian Jews as a subgroup have their own synagogue in London, but there are certainly Sephardi (Mediterranean/ME) synagogues in London, which have slightly different customs and rituals to Ashkenazi synagogues (German/East European), so I would think that Baghdadi and Bene Israelis would go there.

  81. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:53 pm  

    i was gonna ask vikrant which of your 3 computers are you sitting at now in which continent but you’ve given the game away..

    None infact, i’m using this ole geezer Celeron laptop donated by my miserly dear cousin Kashmira.

  82. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:57 pm  

    my miserly dear cousin Kashmira.

    d’oh!

    neeways back to stupid Integration….

  83. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 7:59 pm  

    so I would think that Baghdadi and Bene Israelis would go there.

    I would be neither infact since Bene Israelis have some customs peculiar to them.

  84. sonia — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:16 pm  

    vikrant you seem to know a lot about this..

  85. sonia — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:18 pm  

    ah..what if lovely cousin kashmira is reading this thread? are you back at school/college – whatever the hell they call it nowadays.

  86. Chairwoman — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:22 pm  

    There is certainly a Synagogue that my friends from Pune attend, most of the congregation are from that area.

  87. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:24 pm  

    vikrant you seem to know a lot about this..

    I do, since my hometown had a Bene Israel majority until 1950′s, it now has a Muslim majority. Infact the the site where Bene Israelis landed in India is not very far from Alibaug. My great-gramp had many Jewish tenants on his estates during the good ole Zamindari days under British.

  88. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:28 pm  

    ah..what if lovely cousin kashmira is reading this thread?

    Naah shes out somewhere with her boyfriend… i;m covering up for her! (for a substantial bribe at that) lest my gran come to know.

    Neeways i’m doing International Baccalaurete which is basically same as A Levels.

  89. Katy Newton — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:29 pm  

    I bow to the Chairwoman and to Vikrant.

    I am rubbish at being Jewish, everyone knows that. I can’t even keep Kosher properly. I got sacked from a bagel bakery when I was 15 because I didn’t realise that the tongs with the blue band around them were only for milk stuff, so I kept using them for non-milk stuff which customers might have been buying to eat with meat.

    In my defence, no one told me. I suppose they would pathetically argue that because I’m Jewish I should have known.

    I made people unclean until sundown. Me. I did that. Me.

    :-(

  90. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:29 pm  

    There is certainly a Synagogue that my friends from Pune attend, most of the congregation are from that area.

    Where is it? Never knew Hendon had Bene Israelis!

  91. Katy Newton — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:31 pm  

    :(

  92. Katy Newton — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:31 pm  

    Stupid, BLASTED emoticons

  93. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:32 pm  

    @Katy: I know how it feels. The its same with me and Hinduism.

  94. Chairwoman — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:37 pm  

    Vikrant – Finchley Lane, just past the petrol station on the way to the A1. It’s in the old telephone exchange.

  95. sonia — on 1st October, 2006 at 8:54 pm  

    he heh vikrant, so now you’ve got a good hold over her..

  96. Jagdeep — on 1st October, 2006 at 9:00 pm  

    Kashmira – beautiful name!

    Katy, that sounds just like Sikhs. Wherever there are Sikhs, there are more Gurdwaras than there needs to be, because every sect and school wants their own temple, and sometimes they even compete with each other!

  97. Vikrant Singh — on 1st October, 2006 at 9:16 pm  

    @sonia: read http://www.hadassah.org/news/content/per_hadassah/archive/2000/Feb/travel.htm
    see the side trips section for info about Jews in Alibaug.

    so now you’ve got a good hold over her..

    Hehe.. they say i’m as cunning as me father… a chip of old block… nay.. i’m a brand new block with double the Rajput guile.

    @Chairwoman: i’m not that knowledgable about North London, but i’ll check it out for sure next time i’m in Hendon!

    @Kayty: Believe me not knowing about your religion is not half as bad as not knowing your family. Shielded from my paternal family for over a decade by mama dearest i hardly know my first cousins on dad’s side. (Given the fact that i have over 14 first cousins doesnt help). Last year i was in Jaipur to attend my cousin’s wedding. So i got introduced to one of my cousins Aman. We were well… dicussing girls when this stunning chick walked past me. I causually remarked what a hot titty chickita she is, it turned out she was Aman’s sister and my first cousin! Shit even to this day, i dont dare look her in the eyes

  98. Rakhee — on 1st October, 2006 at 10:12 pm  

    Well while all of you were merrily blogging away, I’ve just spent the last 3 hours having to de-ice my freezer because I must have accidentally left the door open and then closed it.

    One ice-pick, a hairdryer and a steam cleaner later, I now have no food but a sparkling fridge-freezer.

    Humph.

  99. sonia — on 2nd October, 2006 at 12:32 am  

    boy that sure sounds like hard work! at least you’ve got it done now. must be some trick of freezers – if you don’t actually doublecheck to make sure the door closes it doesn’t close..

    vikrant – heh heh that’s funny – but just think – you could have even hotter cousins that you don’t know about!

  100. Rakhee — on 2nd October, 2006 at 9:43 am  

    Sonia, lol, that’s exactly what my mum said ;)

  101. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 11:50 am  

    rohin this rohin that. even on the eve of my wedding, he has to pop up and once again ruin my life

  102. Katy Newton — on 2nd October, 2006 at 12:04 pm  

    Rohin will never come between us turn us against each other, Kismet.

  103. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 12:14 pm  

    I don’t think a woman has ever said anything sweeter to me in my life

    But then women rarely speak to me

    But that’s not to take this moment of glory away from me

    Smells like napalm in the morning

  104. Jagdeep — on 2nd October, 2006 at 12:52 pm  

    Kismet Hardy you’re like the Bengali Sid James, arent you? I bet you used to love watching the Carry On films.

  105. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:00 pm  

    Stop with these sid james and frankie howard references! Why can’t I be Bill Hicks dammit! I wanna be the bangladeshi bill hicks. Although my mum thinks I look like dudley moore. Minus the supermodels :(

  106. Jagdeep — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:08 pm  

    It’s because you’re always talking about your cock and making double entendres about wanting to stroke your girlfriends pussy and other Frankie Howardisms, KH. Although I admit your personality test was a stroke (ooh err!) of satirical genius.

  107. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:13 pm  

    I resent that. There’s nothing double about my entendres. I’m pretty single minded when I say: have cock, want sex

  108. Katy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:15 pm  

    And to think that by Thursday I shall be Mrs Hardy.

    Or possibly Mrs Newton-Hardy.

    Or possibly Mrs Hardy-Newton.

  109. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:19 pm  

    Katy, I don’t subscribe to the Handmaid’s Tale practice of naming women after men. You stay Katy, don’t change, I’ll be your Tarzan.

  110. Katy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 1:26 pm  

    But I’ve had all these thankyou cards made out in the name of Ofkismet Hardy-Newton

  111. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 2:41 pm  

    Oh okay. As long as I can be called Ofkaty…

  112. Kismet Hardy — on 2nd October, 2006 at 2:42 pm  

    PS. you like margaret atwood. Yay. Let’s lay eggs together :-)

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