Big Bhaiya


by Rohin
19th July, 2006 at 8:57 pm    

I’ve just returned from the joint hottest place in the UK on the hottest ever July day (Teddington – 39.3), so please forgive any speling and gramer errers. Hence, something light whilst we all swelter.

The Beeb today announces that Dutch behemoth’s subcontinental arm, Endemol India, are planning a celeb Big Brother Bharat, although – no sex please, we’re Indian. A spokesperson for the production company said “India is a conservative society and is not ready for the raunchy scenes that so characterise the programmes in the West.”

The show will begin towards the end of this year and will probably feature twelve contestants. What celebrities can we expect in the house then? Stars from the worlds of cricket! Film! And…err…yes well I’m sure they’ll find some people, presumably Z-listers just like over here. Radio Sargam has so far name-dropped Pooja Bedi, Simone Singh and Arshad Warsi (don’t worry, I had to look them all up).

Whilst the parallels of getting washed-up has-beens and desperate attention-seekers remain in all international manifestations of BB, the Indian version has some amusing distinctions. Apart from the aforementioned sex ban, religious discussions also seem off limits. Endemol have announced that they will deliberately be choosing participants from different religious backgrounds.

The programme will also not be live, presumably so the producers can chop out controversial statements and superimpose opening umbrellas, popping champagne bottles and hummingbirds and flowers if anyone gets too frisky. However spin-off shows like Big Brother’s Big Mouth and Big Brother’s Little Brother are all in the pipeline too.

The idea of unmarried men and women living under the same roof will raise some eyebrows, but much of the Western media that has covered this story have opted for broad generalisations such as “intimate acts, such as kissing, are never seen on TV screens.” [Link]

OK. No sex. No religion. No access to blogs (probably).

So what the hell will people watch for? Rajesh Kamat, MD of Endemol India suggested female dress sense as a possible talking point. I don’t know about you, but I can hardly wait. He also says he wants the sexual chemistry to “push the envelope of Indian broadcasting”. NOW you’re talking Mr Kamat.


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12 Comments below   |  

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  1. Geezer — on 19th July, 2006 at 9:10 pm  

    Brother Bharat, although – no sex please, we’re Indian.[Rohin]

    Lol……

    Ok so what’s going to be providing the titillation? Some dude may find out that another house mate killed his child hood sweet heart years back but he was knocked cold out while trying to defend her. His memory will awaken whilst a house mate cooks with the type of masala she used to cook with and then finds out that the guy cooking only cooks with this masala to remind him of his trophy kill. All hell then breaks loose and the hero pumps 200 rounds into his nemesis whilst ratings go through the roof.

  2. Rohin — on 19th July, 2006 at 9:19 pm  

    Geezer, THAT’S the kind of shit I want to see. Oh hang on…I have Zee already. Indian soaps get a tough press, but they’re no worse than most countries’. I just fear an Indian BB will be boring. Oh hang on (again) ALL BIG BROTHERS ARE BORING.

    Now. Here’s the real debate. Who do you want in the Indian celeb big bro house?

    I’ll kick things off.

    The Sen sisters (somebody’s guaranteed to get lucky with them there), Feroz Khan (all the women are unlucky with him there).

    Saurav Ganguly and Greg Chappel.

    Umm…I’ll keep thinking. Might as well chuck in Bipasha, Mallika, Priyanka and co.

    Daler Mehndi, Bappi Lahiri and Baba Sehgal, along with Gurchuran Das, Salman Rushdie and Amartya Sen.

  3. Leon — on 19th July, 2006 at 9:37 pm  

    I’d nominate the Pres of Pakistan to be in the house…

  4. Vladimir — on 19th July, 2006 at 9:37 pm  

    I would like to see the follwoing people in the BB house:

    Narendra Modi
    Arundhati Roy
    Laloo Prasad Yadav
    Rakhi Sawant

    oh… the controversy, the bitch’in and arguments how good would that be!

  5. raz — on 19th July, 2006 at 9:39 pm  

    Benazir and Nawaz :)

  6. sunray — on 19th July, 2006 at 11:11 pm  

    MOTA BHAIYA

    we all knew this was coming.
    why does everyone think they will use big names to go in the house. It’ll be more like a group of ppl– like the cricket team in Lagaan.
    A dumb villager, a Punjabi, a Gujarati,An Untouchable, from South and North, a model, and possibly a rich guy from Mumbai.

    Geezers been watching too many Bollywood movies.

    Cant wait.

  7. Sunny — on 19th July, 2006 at 11:15 pm  

    Stop with all this tame shit, please!!!

    I want 5 Shiv Sena crew, and 5 Laskhar e Taibya crew in there. that will be worth watching. Oh yeah.

  8. Rohin — on 19th July, 2006 at 11:16 pm  

    sunray we’re kidding around – of course we agree with you, it will be a bunch of randoms carefully selected to represent various groups.

    And for all you naming Pakistani celebs – this is BB INDIA!

    Laloo though – great suggestion.

  9. Tilling — on 20th July, 2006 at 12:02 am  

    That’s last year’s eye. It is so over. This is the new eye: -

  10. Tilling — on 20th July, 2006 at 12:03 am  
  11. xyz — on 20th July, 2006 at 1:26 am  

    The Gandhis (Sonia, Rahul, Priyanka) vs. the Bachchans (Amitabh, Jaya, Abishek and his sister).

  12. Nisha — on 20th July, 2006 at 7:03 am  

    For some reason, J Jayalalitha, she of Tamil Nadu and (alleged) lesbian tendencies, comes to mind

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